Stuff My Evil Twin Wrote

The only true way to make as much cash as you want is to actually create it yourself.  The cash, I mean.

Get into the cash counterfeiting business.  Real cash isn’t worth much more than counterfeit right now anyway, if you live in the States.

If you can’t afford the necessary equipment (whatever that is) to make fake bank, don’t worry; there are still things you can work on to start becoming the best criminal you can be!

The first skill you’ll need to practice:  lying.

Lie often.  Tell lies when you can’t possibly benefit in any way from doing so.  If there’s no potential benefit, there is also very little risk.  This formula has been endorsed by professional logicians at every major university and is known by the shorthand phrase “can’t win, can’t lose.”  Several of the logicians have expressed the concern that people who don’t understand formal logic will associate this phrase with the slogan “just do it,” which could eventually result in a stupid trademark warning from Nike.

See how easy it is to make stuff up?  I just wrote a paragraph of utter nonsense in about thirty seconds, and to give it more credibility I stuck in a link to a story about something that actually happened.  If I can do that, you can make a ton of cash with a laser printer.  Don’t ever give up on the dream!